Archive for the ‘Humor’ Category
I had never even heard of this program or its host, when I stumbled across this video; but these two guys are so good:
…and hilarious, that I couldn’t stop watching it! They sure have the voices and mannerisms down pat. 😀 ◄Dave►
…because none is necessary… well, I did rather like the point that Cruz is so unlikable that even God won’t speak directly to him. 😀 ◄Dave►
…to me. I always celebrate March 9th, because on this date in 1973, was the last time I ever wore a silly necktie. 🙂
Forty-three years ago today, I abandoned my reasonably successful high-tech corporate career in Silicon Valley, to become an entrepreneur. During my farewell speech at my going-away luncheon, I removed my necktie and gave it to a colleague, promising to never again put such a ridiculous thing around my neck. I have faithfully kept that vow to this day, even though I have occasionally been turned away at fancy restaurants and night clubs. To me, one’s principles are inviolable. 😀 ◄Dave►
Those from my generation, who may not have had their ears inoculated by a drill sergeant in their youth, might wish to skip this:
…but one is unlikely to find a better indictment of the status quo, and explanation of Trump’s appeal to frustrated and pissed-off Jacksonians, all done in just four minutes. Count on this going viral. If trump could use it as a commercial, he would win in an unprecedented landslide. 😉 ◄Dave►
As the candidate field narrows, things get no better. Just consider a few (to me) obvious aspects of the unfolding story:
On the Democrat side, an appalling number of people are supporting an avowed socialist who promises a utopia that is so obviously impossible that one would think this is some manner of national joke. Except that he actually means it. And many well educated people who, of all people, should know better, are supporting his nonsense. I have no expectation that he will win but the simple fact that he has garnered significant support speaks very poorly of we-the-sheeple.
Of course, the Dems do offer an alternative in the form of one of the most dangerous political criminals in recent history. Even though she is being “investigated”, we can rest assured she has the political clout to remain free, dangerous, and very possibly, our next president.
The visual is rather incongruent with the image that normally comes to my mind when I hear this ’60s classic:
…but for a bunch of Brits in tuxes with ukuleles, they sure do a fantastic job of it! Enjoy… 😀 ◄Dave►
Here is a change of subject from politics. For those who thought I might have been joking about it being time to get my tomato plants in the ground the other day, here is a picture I took yesterday. The fresh strawberry stand beside this field has a sign saying it won’t open until March, but look closely at the already ripening berries in the foreground. 🙂
I thought about adding the Beatles song playing in the background; but after Chris’ complement about my clean low-bandwidth site, I didn’t want to disappoint him. 🙂 ◄Dave►
This is an open thread for comments on the results of the NH Primary, with particular emphasis on the Trump vs. Cruz show. Chris is providing the popcorn, and I intend to supply the champagne. 😀 ◄Dave►
This lately from Breitbart: EXCLUSIVE–Linda Tripp: ‘Bill Had Affairs with Thousands of Women’
You know, you really have to admire the guy despite him being a totally despicable criminal sleezeball. Even pretending to be governor then president is hard enough — but to be bedding women by the THOUSANDS in the process? Wow. My one woman wears me out.
In addition to the drivel I post here, my aging mind rambles in many other directions – none of them in the least productive, but, at least it helps keep the old gray matter a bit more pliable.
For instance, I was just thinking about another great paradox (doesn’t most of human life seem to be exactly that?). In this instance, it occurred to me that (IMHO) the greatest tool for the enhancement of individual liberty occurred in the latter half of my own life. I refer, of course, to the Internet. Yet, this great tool for enhancement of liberty, via unfettered communication, occurred at the same time that so many people have been dumbed down to the point where they really have nothing worth saying (or hearing). Your typical combined miracle and tragedy. So, the Internet is used, primarily, for useless drivel. Just think of it. At no other time in human history would it be likely that a small group of people, like the participants in this blog – people who will probably never know each other as physical human beings, nevertheless can come together to discuss whatever amuses us.
Then I think – what if the Internet had been invented in the late 18th century? Imagine Tom Paine distributing his pamphlets to the world, not just to a handful of revolutionaries? Imagine that Jefferson could have participated, real time, in the drafting of our Constitution even though he was on another continent and on another mission at the time. Myriad similar examples abound.
Today I propose to you that all belief systems share a common fallacy when, instead, they should share a common truth.
Let us imagine that I am greatly troubled (as I sometimes have been in the past) about the origin of this universe. So, seeking a quiet place to ponder, I find myself in a place reserved for the practice of Judeo-Christian worship. As I sit there pondering, a priest/minister/rabbi of that particular sect approaches and asks me the nature of my obvious pondering. I explain and receive the apparently definite answer that this universe, and all it contains was created by a being they call God. Have I received the ultimate answer to the mystery of this universe? No. Only I now ponder about the origin of God.
Later, I find myself in the presence of a renown scientist. One who has truly delved deeply into the physics of this universe. I repeat my yearning to know the origin of this universe. The scientist treats me to a lengthy description, most of which is quite beyond my ability to comprehend, about how all the material that existed started to collapse upon itself due to an ever strengthening gravitational force. Finally, all that matter is condensed down to almost nothing – to a state where, rather than condense further, all it can do is explode in the greatest explosion this universe has ever seen. Then, as the detritus from that explosion started to cool, it started processes that ultimately produced this universe. Do I now know the ultimate answer to the mystery of this universe? No. Now I am even more confused because I have no idea where that matter came from to begin with much less how gravity came to be.
Many people earnestly believe that our universe (multiverse?) and all within it were the result of a conscious act by an intelligent being. I propose to describe, in this article, a possible method whereby that might really have happened, devoid of any and all acts by that dynamic duo Hocus and Pocus.
I begin with a fact that is self-evidently true… if there was/is a creator, that creator pre-existed that which it created – in this case, the present universe which we inhabit. That being true, it must be equally true that the creator of this universe is not OF this universe, therefore any attempt to “know” anything about said creator is doomed to failure. This is because all our ability to “know” or to “describe” anything is based on the known laws of this universe, leaving us helpless to “know” or “describe” anything outside this universe where whatever laws may exist are unknown to us.
Having established that basis, let us try to agree that there are two primary methods by which this universe might have been created. The first, which I will label the “Zap! – Zam! – Viola! method which, of course would depend on magic (the “creator” having magically “created” everything in this universe via supernatural methodology). Since it is impossible to have a rational discussion on any subject that necessarily includes superstition, the supernatural or mysticism, I reject this method.
As previously stated, I am essentially dropping out of political commentary because the political situation is beyond the ken of rational discussion. Yet, I still have the urge to amuse myself via diarrhea of the keyboard, hence a journey into new fields of discussion.
Today’s rant was inspired by a billboard I saw the other day while riding down the highway. Now, I had seen this and similar billboards for years but, for some reason, this particular sighting rather slapped me upside the face when the idiocy of its message actually got through. The message:
LIFE BEGINS AT CONCEPTION
Now anyone with ¼ of a brain knows that life, as we currently understand it, actually began several billions of years ago.
I am a longtime fan of the writings of the late Dr. Carl Sagan. Among other insights he offered us was that while the universe seems likely to spontaneously produce new life on a grand scale, by processes we do not yet fully understand, there remains the possibility that the universe got the process right ONLY A SINGLE TIME. And, in Dr. Sagan’s opinion, on the mere possibility that spontaneous life was a singular occurrence, we should treat it as a miracle beyond mere reverence. I find myself in total agreement with Dr. Sagan’s viewpoint.
I already have a “Ringer on Trump” post; but here is an even better one. In fact it is a brilliant analysis of a Trump vs. Hillary match-up in November, if they both get their Party’s nominations. It is beautifully written, not too long, and I concur with it 100%. I highly recommend that you go read it in its entirety, so I will only excerpt a few teasers to entice you to do so:
…Bubba is a world class con man, to be sure, but Hilla the Hun is a rank amateur.
In fact, I would have to say that she has less credibility than any politician I can remember — and that’s saying a lot, considering the fact that most politicians hover near zero when it comes to that trait. Surely, Hillary’s handlers must wince every time she opens her mouth — especially when she talks about things like love, kindness, and the “war on women.”
That’s why it’s always puzzled me that so many people seem to believe Hillary is invincible. My take on her is that she is so inherently wicked, so corrupt, so vicious, such an outlandish liar, and such a transparent fraud that anyone short of Ronald McDonald, Mitt Romney, and Mush McCain could KO her with one verbal punch.
Or, how about this:
…Trump haters are placing their hopes on the belief that he’s alienated so many people that it would be impossible for him to get enough electoral votes to win a general election.
I’m not a Trump supporter (I don’t support any politician!), but I must take issue with the foregone conclusion of the Trump-hating crowd. In fact, I’m almost tempted to go so far as to say that the reason Trump might very well win it all is because he alienates so many people.
What media knotheads don’t get is that anti-establishment guys like me would love to see anyone take a wrecking ball to Washington’s Den of Thieves and break up the nonstop party that’s been going on for at least fifty years. That’s why I’m inclined to believe that the more Trump says nasty things, the more likely he is to win over fed-up Republicans, Democrats, and, above all, independents.
I recall that some of you have a rather low opinion of Ann Coulter; but her latest column, “IT’S TIME FOR THE OTHER 13 CANDIDATES TO DROP OUT,” is well worth the read. For example:
At what point in Donald Trump’s inaugural address do you figure the GOP establishment will finally grasp what’s been happening?
The establishment — not “elites,” because they’re mostly bland functionaries who went to third-rate schools — have thrown absolutely everything they have at Trump. I’ve never seen so many Republicans featured on MSNBC.
At least no one will be able to say the Republican National Committee didn’t give it the old college try (and, again, that would be third-rate colleges).
Trump is a runaway hit with Americans for the simple reason that he’s the only candidate saying anything Americans care about.
It is pretty hard to argue with that…
After the San Bernardino terrorist attack, committed by Muslim immigrants — which followed the 1993 World Trade Center terrorist attack committed by Muslim immigrants; the 9/11 terrorist attacks committed by Muslim immigrants; the Fort Hood terrorist attack committed by a Muslim immigrant; the Boston Marathon terrorist attack committed by Muslim immigrants, and on and on — Trump suggested a temporary pause on Muslim immigration.
The other candidates responded by attacking him viciously. Now, the eunuchs are duking it out over who has the most aggressive approach to … fighting ISIS!
Tomi’s clips usually run about two minutes apiece. Two parts on why America loves Trump, back in September:
Then, Part II:
However did Trump manage to resist her cute invitation for an interview? It would definitely have gone way past ‘viral.’ I’d call it his first serious blunder. 🙂 ◄Dave►
In the “I Stand With Joe” post, Chris posted a link to a video by new conservative heart-throb, Tomi Lahren. No, you would have to be a lot younger, you old letch; she is only 23. You would also need to be a lot tougher; rumor has it that her boyfriend is a Navy Seal. If you read “Lone Survivor“, you will understand that he earned her; we didn’t. 🙂
Besides were she available and attracted to geezers, you would be way too late, Chris. I saw her first back in July, when she recorded this one after the Chattanooga terrorist attack:
So, Glenn Beck managed to outbid Roger Ailes for her! I assumed that Ailes already had her contract typed up and waiting for her gig on OAN to end. 🙂
BTW: I just subscribed to her YouTube channel, so expect to see more of her hereabouts. It looks like I have a lot of pleasant catching up to do. Thanks for the reminder, Chris. 🙂 ◄Dave►
While reading some of the White House’s spin to desperately try deflecting any responsibility for the San Bernardino Jihadist’s successful terrorist attack, meanwhile simultaneously railing about the need for more gun-control, it occurred to me that it was time to once again recycle a letter to the editor that I wrote over 20 years ago.
First let me make the point that their insistence that these Jihadists were ‘home grown’ and not members, or under the direction of ISIS or other Jihadist NGO, is to me a distinction without a difference. I suspect their 35 dead and injured victims, and their loved ones, don’t much care either. Puzzling over their ‘motive’ is patently ridiculous. They were Jihadists doing what most irrational Jihadists are anxious to do. Terrorizing and slaughtering infidels while dying for the glory of Allah, to earn the promised rewards for ‘martyrdom’ in their hereafter. Those unable to immediately grasp that, are willfully blind, ignorant, stupid, or lying through their teeth.
LOL! I just had a wicked thought. I wonder what their sex life will be like in Heaven. Will they each have their own individual 73 person orgies, or would it be one big 146 person wife-swapping party? Then, it would seem that by now Allah should have a much larger supply of virgin men for his martyred bride Malik, than virgin women for her cuckold. Also, her virgins would obviously be young, virile, military aged men, while by now Allah is probably scraping the bottom of the virgin barrel and only has elderly nuns and wrinkled old maids left for him. I’m guessing by now Farooq realizes he made a huge mistake, and would have enjoyed better sex if he had stayed on Earth with his once-faithful young bride. 🙂
Anyway, there are a lot of politicians, sheriffs, and even an university president currently advocating Americans prudently arm themselves for self-defense against Jihadists. In “Urban Varmints,” I also advocated rational armed self-defense, rather than cowering in fear while waiting for the government to come to the rescue, from the scourge of urban gangs. I used the analogy of snakes as often harmless; but those displaying the ‘gang colors’ of a rattlesnake, were deadly and not to be trusted. Plug Muslims into the snakes category, and easily profiled Sharia compliant Jihadists into the rattlesnake variety of such, and my 20-year-old missive could be republished as current. ◄Dave►